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All I can say is that if you haven’t heard of Amy Schumer yet, you’ve been living in a paper bag. Her quips and witty satires alone can leave a long-lasting imprint in your collection of party one-liners. In fact, here is one to take to your next get together with friends: “My mom’s always saying really smart things… like, you probably heard this one, ‘Why buy the cow when the milk has HPV?’ Wish I’d listened to that one.” You’re welcome.